What You Want: Part 3

I love a good transit strike ending, don’t get me wrong. But what a train tease to tell us: Look! Trains will run again! We promise! Only to have the news follow up an hour later with: “But not tonight, PSYCH!”

For the past few days, I’ve been amusing myself during my 2.5 mile walks to and from work by making up new and catchy songs. Great little ditties like, “Watch Where You’re Going, Roller Blader,” and my personal favorite, “Get Your Friggin’ Bike Off The Sidewalk, Dickwad.” Fun times.

I thought after hours in the cold, my hair would feel coarse and unruly, a regular mop to be beholden. But…ya know what? It’s actually not so bad. That wouldn’t be because of my new HEAT PROTECTANT now would it…?

Let’s talk about heat, bay-be. Let’s talk about you and me. Let’s talk about all the shine things and the gloss things that may be. Let’s talk about heat. Let’s talk about heat. (Ladies? ALL THE LADIES!)

Okay. So before I talk about why my new favorite heat protectant might not be the best one on the market (even though I love it so much that I nuzzle it daily), let me first introduce you to my new cuddle partner: Kiehl’s Heat-Protective Silk-Straightening Cream.

There I was at Kiehl’s, moaning over the loss of my beloved, discontinued Hair Thickening Lotion (damn you, Kiehl’s. Damnnnnnnn you), and asking the Nice Kiehl’s Lady what I might use in its stead. She looked me up and down and recommended the “Silk-Straightening Cream.” I made a face that loosely translates to “Are you blind, woman? Straight? Me? NOT. I mean, yes, I am straight. Not that there’s anything wrong with…But my hair! Totally not straight. It LOVES to kiss women. Erm, I mean curl up. It loves to curl up. With other hair. Not with…”

Thankfully, Nice Kiehl’s Lady (whom my hair, by the way, was strangely attracted to) interrupted my look with a quick, “Oh, it’s not really a straightener. Only when you blow dry. It just tames frizz and protects your hair from heat!”

Well I think I might just have to throw a party about that one.

After a couple weeks of sampling (Kiehl's is all about samples, so don't be shy), I am happy to say that my hair loves Kiehl’s new heat protectant straightener. I have, of course, not gone the blowing-straight route but rather the drying-while-scrunching-to-get-pretty-spirals route. I take a modest amount of the cream (go easy!) and scrunch it into my waves to tame their frizz. When I then scrunch and blow dry, I don’t feel the same coarseness afterwards that I used to, and I’m happy to say that I will be adding this new product to my regimen.

HOWEVER. This heat protectant may not be the one for you. If you have fine hair to medium/normal hair and you don’t blow dry all the time, then this may be your perfect de-frizzer. (For truly fine hair, use just a drop of product.) It’s less greasy than a serum or gloss drops, and yet it tames nicely.

But for girls who really go for blow-outs, with the brush and the drying or the ceramic hair irons—you need something more. What my new fave lacks, alas, is the best heat protectant ingredient out there: silicones.

Silicones come with pluses and minuses, so let’s take a moment to break it down. No other ingredient will give you as much shine, de-frizzing, and heat protection. Silicones (which come in any number of variations on ingredients lists) are must-haves for women with normal-to-thick/coarse hair who blow dry, iron, or straighten often. However (why is there always a however?), many products with silicones don’t have enough to truly protect your hair, and the products that do have enough? Can make it look greasy if you use too much. So there you are. The silicon scale. Reach the perfect middle and you get the best ingredient out there. Go too low and you get false confidence. Too high and you get ickiness. Ah, what a tricky path we tread.

The most silicone-packed hair products will be serums. These are the ones for the straighteners out there, but remember not to tip the scale and apply too much. Clearly, I wouldn’t be La Real Girl if I didn’t shove some options in your face. So, here. (Has transit strike made Real Girl grumpy? Nahhhh.)

• philosophy curly head silicone hair serum
• BioSilk Silk Therapy
• Phyto Phytolisse Ultra Shine Smoothing Serum

But worry not if you don’t wish to go down the serum path. There be other options.

• Sebastian Potion 9 (famous and world-beloved!)
• Frederic Fekkai Glossing Cream
• Joico Straight Edge Heat-Activated Curl Straightener (which can also keep wavy hair wavy, by the way!)
• Matrix Biolage Smoothing Shine Milk (An appropriately light option for fine hair.)
• Neutrogena Triple Moisture Sheer Hydration Leave-in Foam (This one people either love or hate, go figure.)
• Sebastian Laminates Crema Styler, Anti-Frizz Control (Best for thick, dry hair)
• Tigi Bed Head, Superstar Thermal Blow-Dry Hair Lotion

A word here, my lovelies, about application. One thing that bugs me about hair reporting (besides the fact that CNN doesn't have a hair correspondent yet) is the over-used phrase “root to tip.” NOT EVERY HAIR PRODUCT should be applied root to tip. Silicone products? Like leave-in conditioners and most gels: Tip to root. Start low and work your way up because too much product at the top will weigh your roots down and make ‘em greasy, which is (as we beauty correspondents say) yucky.

For now, I’m going to stick with my Kiehl’s Silk-Straightening Cream, but when I discover which of these silicone products most rocks the hair house, I will be sure to report my findings.

In the mean-time, let’s hear from you all! What do you use (serums, creams, gels, sprays) to tame your frizz and protect your hair from heat? Report away and let’s show CNN a thing or two, shall we?

(Q Train tomorrow morning? Pleeeeeeeeease? I’ll wear my best lip gloss!)

Lovies!!
xx
RG

P.S. HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!! Have a super one, and if you get (or give!) delicious beauty goodies, please share and let us live vicariously.

Coming Soon!!

Update:
The transit strike stole my post again. Sort of.

Tonight, instead of going home, Real Boy walked an extra 20 blocks to my place to surprise me and take me out to dinner. You know, because of all the travel stress. Awwww. So instead of very important beauty reporting, I ate yummy taro wasabi dumplings and key lime pie.

I know, I know. If my post about heat protectant isn't spectacular, you're all going to throw concealer brushes at me. Or worse, foundation bottles. Them things are heavy. Please be nice.

So, Thursday night! After the walking. And the walking. And the falling. And the getting up and walking some more.


Tonight we dish about heat protectant.

Also? I'm hoping we get some subway service. Can we have some trains please? PLEASE?

What You Want: Part 2

Girls (and boys?), I am a tired one tonight. You know the time of year—so crisp and frigid outside but so toasty warm inside, bundled in sweatpants and a high-necked sweater, cuddling a mug of cocoa and a furry feline. No, December does not scream glamour, with its chapping winds and endless Christmas specials. (I was waiting for A Very Merry Prison Break, with Michael devising a plan for Baby Jesus to escape the manger, but alas twas not to be.)

So in honor of the season of giving (which is, hello, every season here at Real Girl Beauty), I’m going to try and tip my amateur hat at some hair questions—with a heap of help from expert Julie.

First up comes this excellent question from Melissa:

Hey there,

I am curious as to your thoughts about at-home hair dyes. As someone who just got married AND moved out of state AND has to do holiday shopping now, going to a good salon for my coloring just isn’t in the budget until at least after the holidays. But with the whole 28 and grey thing happening, I need to do something. Do you have any suggestions / recommendations? I don’t expect to get pretty pretty highlights out of a box, I don’t need miracles. However, I would like halfway decent color without killing my hair. Any ideas you have would be appreciated.

Your blog is great, thanks for it.


Hi Melissa!

Well, congrats on your recent changes—and what better way to celebrate than with a sexy new hair color. I confess I haven’t home hair-dyed since I was about 16. My first salon henna was at 17. (There’s a story about that—it involves getting sassy red highlights the day before the SATs. During the test I made sure to sit near a window so the sun could dapple my darling new ‘do, and I could ooh and ahhh over my dazzling color. No single SAT-taker has ever been in a better mood than I was that day. Honestly? I credit my highlights with getting me the highest scores in my class. So trust me, I feel you on the importance of a good color. Ohhhh, I feel you.)

But first! These incredibly sage words of warning from Chere Julie, who TOTALLY knows her stuff when it comes to La Color:

[This is] a tough one. Since I have never used any of the over-the-counter hair coloring kits, I have no idea what to tell someone to buy to use on their own hair. My only advice is to be careful, because if they use some random over the counter color they can really mess their color up if they make the wrong choice. Which means it will cost them 3 times as much to get it fixed by a professional. So in the long run, they will not be saving money at all.

The most cautious thing to do is for her to talk to her stylist/colorist and see what she thinks she should do, since her stylist/colorist knows her hair color history. Because we don't know what is on her hair right now or what is underneath the color she has now. People tend to leave out the fact that they once had their hair black at one time, and then bleached it up to blonde, and then colored it red, and then black again, and so on and so on. It is a very hard call, especially over the internet.

So Melissa! If you don’t have “virgin” hair, beware my dear, beware. Also? With the fancy and the highlights and the lowlights? Best leave that to the pros.

But let’s say your current hair hasn’t popped its cherry yet. I’ve been doing some internet research as well as some consumer research (involving very scientifically peering at women buying hair color in drugstores, getting as close as I could without them alerting security) and here are my empirical results:

It’s a case of oldie but goodie: Clairol Hydrience. Let’s go easy on the tone, however. Like, say, the in-your-face brassy red you might see on this very link? Not so cute. Beware of reds in general, I would say.

Perhaps you’d like a less ultra-permanent color to start, however, as I would recommend. Clairol Hydrience is a “level 3,” but a good “level 2” option would be the easier to take Clairol Natural Instincts. Desert Sunrise doesn’t look so bad, does it? Even if the name screams "Lifetime Television"?

Another popular option would be L'Oreal Preference, which--according to the box in the link--aims to be the home hair color for the Carol Bradys of the world. But it's not like they're home-cutting your hair, right?

I wish I had a meatier, better-informed answer for you, but I’m hoping the brilliant Real Girlettes (not to be confused with “Gillette,” although—yes—both are “the best a man can get”) commenters will help a beauty sister out here.

Which brings us swiftly to…Question 2! From long-time reader Erin:

Dearest Real Girl,

I know you haven't done an "ask real girl" in awhile, but I have a
question about flat irons. I just got a cut that requires a bit more
maintenance than I am used to and necessitates the purchase of a flat
iron. I know ceramic is best, but how do I choose from there? target
has prices ranging from 16 to 60 dollars, but my friend's flat iron
cost like a hundred.

also, heat protectant? what?

feel free to ignore this one - you have beautiful curly hair that you
probably don't have to torture in this manner :)

Poor Erin. She asked me this question, like, a month ago and probably has already bought her flat iron and heat protectant, and I suck. But you know who totally doesn’t? JULIE! So let’s hear first from the expert.

Hmmmm, flatirons!!!

I am still using the same flatiron that I purchased 10 years ago for $150. However I have heard lots of good things about the ceramic irons, but have never used one. But I would reccomend spending the extra cash on a good one, since it will last a hella lot longer than the cheaper ones. The cheper ones might not get hot enough or worse....they can get too hot and damage the hair.

I have heard lots of good things about the GHD (Good Hair Day) flat irons from other stylists. They can cost about $200, I think.

I prefer an iron that has a beveled edge. A beveled edge gives you the choice of kicking the ends out, turning them under, or just zipping it straight down the hair shaft to make it pin straight.

Your girls sure hit you with some tough questions. I could just imagine what they ask about skincare, jeesh.

I know! But who doesn’t love a challenge?

Umm….yeah. So it turns out? Ceramic flat irons are totally expensive. But here are some possibilities I found by researching on the all-encompassing Internet:

1. I would be remiss if I didn’t include the GHD Flat Iron mentioned by Awesome Julie.
2. One of the best-rated cheapies was: Ceramic Tools Professional Flat Iron.
3. This puppy was popular hair e-retailer folica.com’s best rated option, at $125.
4. And here’s a nicely priced $85 Solia that’s also one of folica.com’s 10 best.

SOME KEY TIPS: It's healthiest for your hair if you flat iron when it's completely dry--heated water can rupture your hair shaft. Also, keep the iron moving. If you let it rest on one section of hair, that section will fry like Victoria Gotti on a tanning bed.

Not so cute.

Oh, Real Girlettes. I’ve been writing for so long now, and the eyelids, they are so very heavy.

SO I may have to save heat protectant for next week. But please! Help our intrepid gal pals with home color and ceramic (or other!) flat irons.

And next week we’ll gab about heat protectant, which can help us ALL, and which I actually have something to say about. I’ve just found a new one that I heart! I’m such a friggin’ tease.

But I’m also your,
warm and sleepy,
Real Girl
xx

What You Want: Part I

(Recent and frustrating problems with my home internet connection are now hopefully resolved. I'd tell you about it except for its boringness and the extreme amounts of potty-mouth language I would have to use...)

The next two RGB entries will be about you and your questions. Because I love you and your questions. You are nice people. And if you look your best, then I get to see prettier people. See how selfish I am?

The bulk of questions Real Girl receives fall into three categories.
1. OH MY GOD wrinkles! What can I do to diminish/prevent/abolish them with the fiery power of Satan?
2. My hair needs your help. Pleeeeeeeeeease.
3. You look so trim—what are your diet secrets?

The first two questions I’ve devoted much time and energy to—as you’ve seen and as you will see more of very soon. The last question, however? I’ve been avoiding for months. Why? Because…well…shouldn’t diet tips be left to experts? Who the heck am I to advise people how to lose weight. But the questions…they keep coming. And long-time readers will remember that I used to post a health-related entry now and again (before being taken over heart and mind by ohhhhhh the beauty products and only the beauty products)…So let’s see what I can do.

First of all, I don’t know how you can tell what my figure looks like from a head shot. I did post a slightly more revealing photo a while back, but I promise you I am not skeletal skinny. And ew, that’s not attractive. So let’s not go overboard on our weight loss here, okay? Keep it real, folks.

Secondly, my biggest and best secret isn’t some crazy fad or diet-of-the-moment. It’s this book: Superfoods: Fourteen Foods That Will Change Your Life. Although not a diet book in the traditional weight-loss sense, I can’t tell you how good this book is for promoting health and energy. But more? It’s geared toward giving your body the best nutrients to age as gracefully as possible. By including these foods in your diet, you can fight wrinkles—and the other annoyances of getting’ older—from the inside out.

I’m going to cheat a little and tell you the fourteen superfoods, but I urge you to get the book to find out what the alternative foods are (for instance, I hate beans, but green beans count, and mmmm love those), how much you should be eating of each food, and what nutrients they offer. I will fully confess that I am totally not stringent on making my diet all about only healthy food. But when I choose to eat a pint of ice cream for dinner every once in a while? Superfoods make me feel way less guilty.

1. Beans
2. Blueberries
3. Broccoli
4. Oats
5. Oranges
6. Pumpkin
7. Salmon
8. Soy
9. Spinach
10. Tea—green or black
11. Tomatoes
12. Turkey
13. Walnuts
14. Yogurt

How you incorporate superfoods into your diet must be up to you, but I’ll let you know what I do. For breakfast, I have my energy-licious Spiru-tein soy protein shake (I'm into banana right now), always with frozen blueberries added in. I can only say it is friggin’ yummy.

I guess my other biggest weight-loss strategy is to have a large lunch and a small dinner. For lunch, I like to have a big salad, preferably from Café Metro. I love Café Metro because of their awesome all you can eat salad for less than $7. And let me tell you, I so take advantage of it. “Big salad” does little to evoke the bigness—and the fillingness—of this lunch. In this salad I include: baby spinach, grilled chicken, avocado, artichoke hearts, mozzarella cheese, carrots, cucumbers, broccoli, grape tomatoes (so good), almonds, sunflower seeds, croutons, sweet corn, and scallions. Sometimes? (And lately more than sometimes?) I also have a giant Rice Krispie treat too. This is one reason why I currently have about 6 lbs to lose. Sigh. The Whole Foods salad bar rocks, too. Oh, and I so don‘t go easy on the dressing, so I try to keep it low-fat.

I then usually have a small dinner of fruit, soup, or—and this is a fave!—blueberry yogurt that I make by combining yummy Stonyfield Farm Nonfat French Vanilla Yogurt with dozens of frozen blueberries and leaving the mixture in the fridge over night. When you’re ready to eat, just stir and enjoy fresher and sweeter blueberry taste than you’d find in any pre-packaged yogurt. (If you use plain yogurt rather than French Vanilla, you might want to keep some Splenda nearby.)

To sum up: lots of vegetables, big lunch, small dinner. But also key? The whole thing goes down the drain on the weekends. From Friday night to Sunday night, I eat anything I damn well please, including raspberry cheese croissants from Au Bon Pain each morning. MMMM. Because who can stick to a diet without cheating? I love cheating.

All this seems easy to write and read, but I’m lucky that I truly love and crave my healthy salads, shakes, fruit, yogurt, etc. I refuse to sacrifice taste. But if nothing else, I fall back on my small dinner strategy to lose those extra pounds. Once I’m into the routine, it sails by swimmingly. I don’t crave more food after dinner and I’m not dying of hunger the next morning. The hard part—and it is, indeed, hard—is getting my body used to the small dinner routine. For instance, with Thanksgiving and the holidays here, I’ve been having rather large dinners for the past few weeks. Hence my need to lose the 6 lbs. But getting myself back to my small dinner routine has been excruciating. Because at night, I’ve been used to more food—and so I’ve been getting hungrier. The only thing to do is to force myself to have a small dinner and ignore the hunger, and then by the next night and the night after that, etc., my body’s used to it, and all is hunky dory. But if I start up with big dinners again? The pants become snug. Also? I’m going to have to start ignoring those huge, fluffy-looking Rice Krispie treats right by the salad bar at Café Metro. Damn you, tasty treats.

I hope you’ll get the Superfoods book. Everyone I’ve recommended it to has raved about their increased health and energy. And in a couple of decades, your younger-than-their-years heart, skin, and health will thank you.

But come on, please share your diet—both health and weight loss—secrets! I’m dying to hear them!

With love from your,
Real Girl
xx

P.S. HAPPY BIRTHDAY REAL MOM!! On December 5, Real Mom has a birthday that’s very close to a major milestone. (Celebrating? Included a night of karaoke until 2AM involving two random 23-year-old guys dedicating their every song to my inebriated mother. Also? They gave her roses.) To show you all how younger-than-her-years she’s looking these days, I present a Thanksgiving pic of three generations of real girls.

Don’t Cry For Me Antintina

Jonathan Antin, if you’re reading this right now? You’d better grab a hanky.

Anyone who became as inexplicably hooked as I did to Bravo’s Blow Out will know what I mean. In the first season (which I did not watch), celebrity hairstylist Jonathan Antin expanded his Jonathan Salon empire. In this last season? The one that had me both perched on the edge of my seat and laughing like a mad woman? He created a product line. That’s right. It’s called Jonathan Product.

Here are some things you learn from watching Blow Out:
1. Jonathan Antin isn’t gay.
2. No, seriously, he isn’t. I’m as shocked as anyone.
3. If Jonathan doesn’t like the Jonathan Product sample you show him, he will throw it against a wall. Hard.
4. But if you praise his product? Like, if you call him on the phone and say, “Oh my God, Jonathan, this is the best product I’ve ever used. No, really, it’s amazing. I won’t use anything else ever”? Then he’ll cry.
5. When the product sells at QVC? Tears. Sephora? Rivers. The man goes through tissues like Rosie O’Donnell goes through cupcakes. (And I’m going to hell for that one.)

I’m getting somewhere with this—I promise. And that somewhere? Is bliss. HAIR FRIGGIN’ BLISS. Mine has never looked better. I owe it all to Jonathan’s Dirt.

Jonathan created Dirt to mimic the look of day-old hair, when it’s all manageable and sexy (at least, for some people other than me). As he tells us on the box, “There’s something amazing about the way hair looks and behaves the day after – washing, that is.” (Because clearly we were all thinking sex!) “I created Dirt to help you get that look easily.”

Yeah, I don’t know about all that. I’d call Dirt a light, non-waxy pomade. Jonathan calls it a “texturizing paste,” and I’ve got to admit that about gets it right. Jonathan instructs us to, “Rub a small amount in your hands until it liquefies.” Um, Jonathan? This shznit ain’t ever liquefying. The word you’re looking for is emulsify. Basically, folks, choose your amount of product. For my long hair, I’ve been using about a dime-sized dollop. (You want to err on the side of too little rather than too much, so start small.) Then rub the product between your palms. What you’re going to get is sticky palms. (Insert puerile joke here.) What you do with those palms will depend on your hair.

For my curls, I’ve been using my Dirty hands to scrunch my curls, making them more springy and less fly-away-y. The time I used to invest in mitigating flyaways has been cut in half. And the body I get from the curl-scrunching kind of stymies me, given that this product isn’t the most light-weight I’ve ever seen.

What’s most miraculous about this product, though? I can use it when my hair’s not curly. Which used to be never. But on a whim, I brushed out my curls one day, eyeing the frizzy, light-socket hair I was left with. I smoothed on Jonathan’s Dirt, manipulated a little wave at the ends, and was good to go. Do you hear that? Good to go! The frizz was tamed.

For y’all with straight hair, I’m thinking this will help with flyaways and with adding a bit of sexy texture to the mix. I would recommend that people with extraordinarily fine hair stay away, however, because the product may be too hearvy. For my moderately fine hair, I make sure not to use too much.

Honestly? This is the most exciting hair product I’ve found in years. Sure, it’s $26, but considering how much you need to use, that could very well be a two-year supply.

And if you’ll excuse me now, I’m off to play in the Dirt.

But what about y’all? Did you watch Blow Out? Have you tried Jonathan Product? Have you got other texturizing products to recommend? Just feel like chatting?

I remain your,
Real Girl
xx

I’m Doing The Happy Lip Dance.

(By the way? The below has an actual melody that’s now stuck in my head.)
(Harrumph.)

I’m gonna sing my happy lip song.
Because my darling, I’ve sought you for so long.
I wasn’t even sure that you existed.
But now I am so glad that I persisted!

Because glossy glossy glossy I love you.
Glossy glossy glossy, it’s so true.
When I feel your touch, my lips start to quiver,
But then your silky oils, they calm down my shiver!

(Time for the bridge)

How do you do it? How do you stay so moisturizing?
And at the same time, you’ve found the perfect texturizing.

Glossy glossy glossy I love you!

Can’t you totally picture some 80's balladeer getting down to that? No? Just me? Anyhoo.

Enough skirting around this issue. I’ve already shouted it out my window to the cars on Fifteenth Street. I love this gloss!!! The Body Shop Tropical Lip Duo has simply not left my lips since I nestled it in my handbag. Let’s talk about why.

What do I want in a gloss? I want it to be shiny, but not Paris Hilton shiny. I want it to be sticky enough to stay on, but not so goopy that my lips actually feel glued together. I want my lips to be moisturized, but not so much that the gloss just slides right off after two seconds. But also? I need a good bronzy—not coppery, not brassy, not too brown—color. I think it's a color that works well with almost any skin tone. You’re just gonna have to trust me that the "Bronzed" Lip Duo looks nothing like what’s pictured here. It’s much lighter, much more subtle, much more flattering. And what’s even cooler? The sparkly gloss on the other end? Is the most perfect clear shimmery gloss I’ve ever seen. Let’s say you love the look of clear gloss, but you think yours is too thick, or it’s too much shine for fall, or you think it’s too sparkly. The clear gloss here just gives your lips an extra boost—a natural, non-goopy, non-excessive, sexy shine. And the sparkle merely kicks in a hint of cute. You may just barely notice it.

Not convinced yet? The Tropical Lip Duo is the only—I repeat only—gloss I’ve found that I can wear without lip balm underneath. That’s how good it feels, even as chapping weather approaches. I’m guessing the “Marula Oil” that the Body Shop lists as the active ingredient must be lapping my lips with luscious moisture. As for why the Lip Duos are being called “Tropical,” I confess I’m a bit stymied. In French, this product is called “Duo Levres Exotique,” which I find much sexier, don’t you?

If I’ve piqued your interest, here are a few key points to consider:

1. The Body Shop looooooves to discontinue their products. I’m already planning to buy an emergency Lip Duo this weekend. Also? I'm considering mailing death threats. You know, just in case.
2. Go easy with the applicator wand. This is a fall/winter gloss—high on moisture, but with a more subtle shine than those megawatt summer glosses. Don't try to heap it on too thickly.
3. I haven’t yet tried the “Golden Pink” color, but judging how much darker the “Bronzed” color looks in this picture, I’m guessing it’s much lighter than what you’re looking at.
4. This product costs $12.50. For two glosses. Granted, they’re on the small side, but still—I’m loving the value.
5. I consistently find that the Body Shop’s makeup line is under-rated and under-publicized. Over and over, it’s one of my favorite places to browse.

In conclusion:

Ohhhh, wo-oh-oh. Glossy glossy glossy I lo-ove you!

Start your engines, girls. Because I’m asking you to share your favorite lip gloss. Starting…now!

(Or your fave Body Shop products, questions, anything at all, yada yada.)


With love,
From one Real Girl to another.
xx

Happy Birthday To Us!!!

Exactly one year ago, on November 15, 2004, something revelatory happened.

I found Real Girl.

I knew she had always been there, hiding behind a studious, hard working little New York editor turned novelist. She’d pop out once in a while, accompanied by a single, vehement phrase: OH MY GOD, YOU HAVE TO TRY THIS! But once in a while? So not enough.

Thank you, my gorgeous Real Girlettes, for a luscious year of great product reviews and recommendations. May we all continue to grow poorer and more excited as the coming seasons fill our bulging makeup bags with ripe colors, saturated powders, healthful creams, and—of course—more antioxidants than you can shake a wrinkle at.

And as a birthday present to us all? Real Girl’s got a stunner coming Tuesday night.

I’ve found a new favorite lip gloss. Did you hear that? A new favorite lip gloss. The top of the product pyramid, my friends. And the odds are? You’ve never tried it before…

So stay tuned for Tuesday night!

Because of course I remain your,
One year older,
Real Girl
xx

I Am So Fresh

I’ve purposely only used Sephora links in today’s precious post. Why? It’s all because of Demery, so go and blame her. Or, rather, embrace her. Love her. Take your lip liner and paint flowers on her cheeks. Who’s Demery? She’s the Real Girl Beauty reader who sent me the fantabulous information that Sephora.com (online only, folks!) is having a 20% off sale. Need to read that again? TWENTY PERCENT OFF. The sale starts Monday, Nov. 14th and ends Monday, Nov. 21st. Just use the code FF2005 at checkout.

And now back to our regular programming. Oh, crap. You’ve all fainted with joy and NO ONE is left to read my entry. Poo.

But you know what? I think we all share something, and I think that’s why when I read your comments and emails, I feel like I’m amongst my people. That something is the rush of adrenaline, that giddy squeally feeling you get when you find a new favorite product. When I make a new discovery, all I want to do is run and tell every one of my girlfriends. But, well, you could probably guess that—what with the whole, telling the internet too and all. The thing is? I think that’s how you are, also, when you find a new beloved product. Like I said—we’re each other’s peeps. Beauty peeps.

So guess what? I’ve found a new fragrance so luxurious, sweet, sultry, musky, sexy, and darling all at once that I want to scream it from the rooftops! The bloggy, pink-paged, entry-filled rooftops!

But first, you must know Real Girl’s scent history. After all, who’s to say one girl’s favorite will be another’s? What kind of Scent Gal am I? Would you believe—at my origin, I was no scent gal at all? It’s true. For the first eighteen years of my life, I was allowed no scent. No vanilla candles, no fragrant flowers, and certainly, certainly NO PERFUME.

Heh. You’re imagining Cinderella locked in her aerie dungeon, aren’t you? Poor Real Mom. I’ve probably gone and made her feel bad. See, she’s allergic. To any scented anything at all in the history of scented things that have ever existed. As you might imagine, I’ve spent the past few years of my adult life surrounding myself with every luscious scent I could find. So let’s trot down that memory lane….

My first must-have fragrance, Gucci Rush, was purchased at (today’s special!) Sephora. It was love at first sniff. I consider it a low-note perfume, a deep, sexy, musky perfume. I imagine a humid day in Hawaii, when the scents of saturated flowers mingle with the dewy air. I fell deeper in love when I gave my Rush its first test drive—I was on vacation in London, and let’s just say I heard more English men use the word “gorgeous” than I ever have before or since. Men like the Gucci Rush. They just do.

But after a while, I wanted to feel lighter. I was in a springy, breezy mood. That’s when I fell in love with the still sexy—but in a cuter way--Stila Crème Bouquet. (By the way, for some reason the roll-on smells different to me, and I’m not a huge fan despite the alluring price reduction.) My dear Crème Bouquet, your pink, flowery bottle is almost empty, and that makes Real Girl very sad. For your powdery, vanilla-tinged aroma, mingling with the subtlest, least cloying flowers, can only cause happiness to my nose. I still love you, never fear. And I will buy another bottle soon because you'll always be special to me.

Yet that said…

I have a new pet. I love her. Fresh Sake. She's still in her pretty red box because it’s too precious to throw away. The simplicity of the bottle, with its minimally drawn flowers. Just heaven. And the scent! Oh, my God, the scent! I sense a similarity to Gucci Rush in that it’s got some musky undertones, but there’s sweetness too, a dash of succulent fruit. That’s what hits you first—the peachy sweetness. But then the fragrance settles to its true form, letting the softer, deeper, muskier scents through. The result, quite frankly—and no surprise—reminds me of a mixture of Gucci Rush and Stila Crème Bouquet. The sultry and the sweet have finally married and formed the perfect union. Or, as Real Boy said, “Ooh, I like that.”

Spray it on your wrist and wait five minutes. Then see what you think. This entry has taken me twice as long to write because—duh—I keep pausing to sniff myself. I wish I could better describe Sake’s complexity. But hey—stop by your local Sephora and see what you think.

But, wait!! I totally forgot—there’s more!! Fresh has another line of fragrances, called their Index, which seems to offer something for everyone. I haven’t tried every single one yet, but right now I’m partial to Redcurrant Basil. I mean…man, Fresh. Your scents can knock me over with a feather.

(Erm…except for Sugar, which smells nothing like sugar and should in fact be called Lemon Pledge.)

So, now you know all my scenty secrets. I’ve avoided discussing them before because fragrance is such a matter of personal taste. But that’s why I’d love for you gals to tell us all about your favorite scent. Questions? Comments? Fragrance descriptions? Hit us with ‘em!!

I’ll always be your,
Real Girl
xx

Just Call Me Whitey!

Are you excited for the pictures?! I am!! So let’s not waste any time getting to the results of The Great Whitening Experiment of 2005.

But Real Girl, you ask. What the heck are those darned Crest Whitestrips Premium doodads like? Will they burn my gums off? Will they eat up my stomach lining? Will they whiten my lips, too, until I look like a partial albino?

Okay. First, what to do. I followed directions, putting on the upper strip first and the bottom strip second. I then drooled for the half hour you’re supposed to keep the doodads on. Which was nothing compared to the removal process, involving more gelled drooling and some heavy spitting. I don’t know if you’re supposed to rinse afterwards, but I sure did, and I can’t imagine not doing so. The best way to remove the strips is quickly, like a band-aid. And all those commercials where women are wearing their Whitestrips out with their girlfriends, laughing it up? Ummm…nice fantasy there, Mr. Crestipants. Do this at home. Trust moi.

But don’t get too scared! Here’s a picture of me with my Strips on. Aren’t I sexy?



According to the Whitestrips box, one should be able to “Start seeing results after just 3 days,” so let’s see what my teethies were looking like after that crucial almost-halfway-zone, compared with their initial whiteness.


Before

After 3 Days.

Hey! That’s not so bad for just 3 days!

According to the Whitestrips box, Crest says these puppies are “Clinically proven to remove up to 14 years of stain build-up in just 7 days.” I confess I’ve been wondering how they came up with that number. Did one of the test subjects have, like, some stubborn tooth stain that just wouldn’t brighten? And then when the Lab Coat Guys said, “Hark! What is this spot of darkness on your dental surface?” Did the test subject respond, “Oh, I’ve had that for over fourteen years!” The mystery may never be solved, but I welcome theories from you lovely readers….

But now back to the program! I was such a good little bleacher, going through the strips like a trooper and only missing one application (which meant that on my last day, I applied 3 times). Wanna see? Wanna??? Because my teeth are REALLY WHITE now! In fact, I’m a bit peeved by the pics because I just don’t think they capture the transformation. I feel so shiny and clean! Like I could be in one of those Orbit Gum commercials, covered in mud except for my gleaming smile (remember, I don’t usually smile this toothily.) (Oh! And notice that stunning lipstick mark on my tooth in the “After” picture. See how slick I am? Stop being jealous.):


Before

After 7 Days

And don’t get scared, but as long as we’re sharing here, I want to show you the new version of what used to be the yellowest area of my teeth—the lower part of my bottom teeth, near the root. (Ah, Real Girl just keeps getting sexier….)




So there you go! Whiteness! Whiteness that isn’t even captured entirely by the photos! Ta da! And all you need to do is suffer through a week of drooly messiness, right?

Um…not quite. Thank you to the folks who warned me about tooth sensitivity. I don’t normally suffer too badly from heightened sensation in my teeth, but oh boy the Whitestrips will make you feel your teeth something awful! Beware anything too cold, including wind. But right now, I'm only a day after the whole process, and already my teeth are feeling less sensitive. So if you can tough it out, I’d recommend just bearing with it for a week because the heightened sensitivity will go away swiftly. But if you’ve already got sensitive teeth? BEWARE. They will get more so.

By the way? You can’t see me right now, but I’m smiling wide. A glistening, shiny, bleachified smile. You can just call me Whitey from now on.

But what about your experiences? Have you tried other brands? Have you got questions? Anything to recommend?

With love,
From one Real Girl to another
xx

P.S. Guess what I did to celebrate my new whiter teeth? I drank a big glass of red wine! Duh!

The Great Whitening Experiment 2005

Ok, so this? Is my natural smile. It's not very toothy, which is super great. Because while taking these pictures, I noticed that my two front teeth are oddly jagged and ugly. Why did I notice this now more acutely than I ever have before? Because I took fancy high-res pictures of them with my beloved Canon Elph. (I spared you the pics where the tooth thing is most obvious. Actually, I spared me.)




I will try not to obsess over my teeth and pledge to fix them when I have spare dough for cosmetic dentistry. In the meantime...

These are my before pictures! Considering how much coffee I drink, and blueberries (every day!), and red wine (not quite every day, but hey--it's good for the heart), I don't think my pearlies are too unpearly. But still, they better get a lot damn whiter. Why? Because I'm testing out what's supposed to be the miraculous Crest Whitestrips Premium.

I'm 1 day into the 7 day trial, so hang tight. Although if anyone has tips on how to remove these puppies from your teeth in an elegant manner, I would appreciate the heads up. Right now, when I remove them, it's a drooly, gloppy mess. But why am I ruining all the suspense? You'll hear about it very soon.

And I remain your,

Jagged Toothed Real Girl

(wah!)

Prime Time

An aside that relates in no way to today’s special product:

Britney Spears made me open my window and light a scented candle. No, I don’t mean that her hubby Kevin visited my apartment. What I mean is that I received in the mail an unsolicted sample of her new scent, Curious.

While I wouldn’t say that Curious killed the cat (who is thankfully curled up peacefully as I type), I will describe to you what Curious smells like. You know when you’re in a crowded elevator and one annoying woman has put on so much of her favorite scent that the whole place smells suffocatingly of perfume? And not of a specific scent, like rose or sandalwood or musk…but just that generic, unmistakable plain old perfume smell that you find in no way appealing?

There. You no longer have to be Curious. And you definitely don’t have to buy it. (To which you respond: Duh.)


Now on to more fantabulous matters. You know what makes Real Girl mad? When high-priced cosmetics companies make you think you need products that you really, really just don’t need. Neck cream, for instance. In theory, yes, your neck should receive special attention so it doesn’t look wrinkly in old age. But your face cream will do just fine. Don’t sell me some $28 moisturizer that I don’t need, Makeup Counter Lady! Because I am so on to you….

The above pretty much sums up the way I’ve always felt about foundation primer. Foundation is supposed to hide your facial flaws. Now I’ve got to use something to hide those flaws before I use the product to hide the flaws? Humminawha?

Real Readers? Smashbox Photo Finish Foundation Primer has changed my mind.

But Real Girl, you may ask. What does foundation primer do? What you’re getting here is a filler—generally silicone based—that will soak into fine lines, crevices, really anything that will collect foundation. As a result, your foundation will be applied over a flawless (well, relatively) surface, making your skin look damn near perfect. I know. I tried it.

Real Girl Confession Number…God, I’ve lost count. Full disclosure here: I’m not a huge foundation user. And when I do use foundation, I use the beginner’s kind—the almost sheer, incredibly light Prescriptives Traceless Skin Responsive Tint (the foundation for gals who don’t use foundation). This Prescriptives option is so subtle that many of my flaws shine through even with it on. However—and this is what has sold me on the Smashbox primer—with a thin coat of Smashbox Photo Finish covering my skin before application, my foundation makes my skin tone look more even and my skin itself more flawless than I ever expected. If you're a regular foundation user, and you want to get more out of your favorite foundation, this might be your perfect product.

But wait! There’s more! The Smashbox Photo Finish also has a nice cocktail of antioxidants, including Vitamin C (Ascorbic Acid) and grape seed extract, two of the very best. So even if you don’t wear foundation every day, you can still benefit from this product! (However, if you’re only looking for an antioxidant serum, Paula’s Choice Super Antioxidant Concentrate will give you similar antioxidants in the same serum format at half the price. I’ve been using it now for months and I’m quite lost without it.)

So! If you’re not quite thrilled with the way foundation sits on the surface of your skin, Smashbox Photo Finish Primer will definitely improve that. I, for one, know that I will wear foundation more often now just so I can see my face look so delightfully smooth and even-colored.

And fine, Makeup Counter Lady. You can sell me this product without me snapping at you that I DON’T NEED IT. But really. Show me some neck cream and I'm telling you to sit on it.

But what about your experiences with foundation primers? Or maybe your foundation’s so good you don’t need a primer? Have you got questions for La Real Girl?

You know she loves ya,
xx
RG

The Quest For Perfect Hair...

Firstly, I’m sure I’m not the only one to congratulate Amalah on her adorable new bundle of Awwwww. May he experience nothing but love, happiness, and great skin care.


Today, Real Girl ventures into territory previously unknown to her. Territory marked by such road signs as Coarse. Thick. And…bear with me…Perm.

(All this while I grieve over the demise of my favorite TV hottie, Agent Vaughn of Alias, played by Michael Vartan.)

(Doesn’t Real Girl Vartan have a certain ring to it?)

And…moving on.

To Eliza. Hi Eliza! Eliza writes:

Hey Real Girl...

I've got a beauty product question, sort of. I'm just hoping you can help me.

My guy has the strangest hair I've ever seen. It's coarse, curly, kinda dry, very unruly. And it gets even worse in the winter. Can you recommend a moisturizing shampoo and conditioner he ought to be using? I've tried convincing him to shampoo the roots and condition the roots, but when you're only working with a couple inches of hair, it's hard to differentiate the roots and ends...

I really feel like I should be able to help him on my own, but my hair is the utter opposite of his and this is really beyond my realm of known products.

If it's beyond your realm as well, or the scope of your site, I totally understand.

Thanks for any help you can give, though!
Eliza


After receiving this email, I stroked my Real chin and quickly sent Eliza a convenient link to Real Girl’s famous olive oil conditioning post (and by “famous,” I mean “something you may have read six months ago and then promptly forgotten.”) Such a great treatment for guys! It’s neither pink nor scented, and I dare you to find one flower on the packaging.

Eliza responded (making Real Girl giggle out loud): I'll see what I can do about convincing him to put olive oil and a plastic bag on his head... but I'd love more suggestions. Maybe something that won't make him laugh in my face?

So….after much research on the all-encompassing Internet, I am now able to provide a convenient list of products that are well-suited for hair that is both coarse and thick. Important note! These products tend toward build-up, so once in a while (every two weeks? When you notice build-up? I leave it up to you), mix a nickel-sized scoop of baking soda in with your shampoo. That should clean hair all nice and squeaky-like. (Yet another tip from Real Girl’s beloved hair stylist, who’ll be making her own guest-star RGB appearance momentarily.)

Here you go! Softness. Moisture. Silkening. Word making-upping.

Shampoos
Frizz Ease Smooth Start, Defrizzing Shampoo: This should promote shinier, smoother hair.
Joico Triage Moisture-Balancing Shampoo: An excellent moisturizer, especially for coarse and thick hair. (One of your best bets, I think.)
Matrix Curl.life Shampoo: A good conditioning shampoo for curly hair, and even for straight hair.
Zero Frizz Smoothing Shampoo: Again, a good conditioning shampoo for either straight or curly hair.

Conditioners
Beauty Without Cruelty Revitalize Leave-In Conditioner: For dry, coarse, unmanageable hair, it’s hard to beat a leave-in conditioner, and this is a great one for thick hair. (It’s got essential oils.)
Thermasilk Moisturizing Infusing Conditioner, Dry Hair: A pretty basic conditioner, but best for somewhat thick and coarse hair.
Zero Frizz Daily Conditioner: Softens? Check. Defrizzes? Check. Makes more manageable? Check.
Burt's Bees Avocado Butter Hair Treatment with Nettles and Rosemary : A moisturizing hair masque, again with essential oils, best for truly thick hair.
Kiehl’s Lecithin & Coconut Enriched Hair Masque with Panthenol: I actually sampled this recently, and Oh. My. God. The scent is to die for. Coconuty, like a day at the beach. It worked well on my finer hair, giving me lovely softness, and I imagine its essential oils (notice a theme here?) would work nicely on thicker hair too (its own description specifies dry, coarse hair). It's best to leave it on for an hour before washing, so set aside some time there.

Let us know how it works out, Eliza! And let’s hope our gifted readers have other fab suggestions for you too!

Question #2 comes from Angela. Hi Angela!

Real Girl,

Okay, I've got a question for you that you may or may not have any answer to! I know that you have absolutely gorgeous curly locks, but there are some of us out here with fine limp strands in an eternal search for volume and waves! A few weeks ago I saw a little segment on E! about a new perming process--it's supposed to give you that lovely Jennifer Aniston loose wave look rather than the scary poodle look of the 80's. I did some research and found out that it's called a texturizing perm.

Honestly, I'm not even sure if it's available all over the country yet or just in the salon they featured on the show, but have you heard anything about this? Is it too good to be true or is it possible that the search could be at an end! Thanks, and love your site!

~Angela


Well, I’m happy to say that even in sixth grade, when all the “cool” girls were getting perms (of course, we called them “body waves” then), I managed to avoid getting eaten by chemically-treated curlers. But what’s this about a non-pubey perm? A perm that promises the kind of hair we all aspire to? I fully admit it: I covet Jennifer Aniston’s hair. Or at least her talented team of hair experts.

Stumped by all things permy, I immediately contacted my Angel in the Darkness, Julie, also known as my cooler-than-everyone-else hair stylist. (Take that, Jennifer Aniston.) Julie told me she’s never used the texturizing perm, and so I shouldn’t quote her. So I will paraphrase.

Julie’s got the texturizing perm by a company called ISO at her salon and went through a training session a while ago, so she’s got a few details for us. It’s a semi-permanent perm, so it’ll only last about 6 weeks (an estimate). As for the curl, the interesting thing is that it depends on what you use to wrap the hair rather than the product itself. Smaller curlers, tighter curls (do we advise this? Um, no). Big-ass curlers, bigger waves. In fact, you don’t even need to use curlers at all. You can use anything. As evidenced by this gem from Julie that, I’m sorry, I’ve just got to quote: “Actually I remember the strange man teaching us the class saying that you can perm with TAMPONS!! Not that I would, 'cause that just seems really odd, especially coming from a man.” So, basically, you’re looking at a temporary treatment that allows you to customize your wave. Hopefully without any help from feminine hygiene products.

Bedeee bedeee bedeee…that’s all folks!! From me, at least. Now it’s time to hear from you!

And I remain your,
Real Girl
xx

Cheap And Cute! Nuff Said!

Hold on for the ride my friends. Do you see those shoes? Do you know how much I love them? Do you know the kind of tears I will cry if I don't get them? Well guess what? They cost 42 dollars.

Welcome to Delias.com

Before you protest! Yup, I know it's geared toward teens. But I am so not in my teens. I'm in my late twenties, fighting 30 like a lip-glossed Sisyphus on the hopeless quest to push a rock up a hill only to get nipped in the ass when it rolls back on down. Um...where was I going with this? Oh yeah. Sift through the teen stuff. Push it aside. Find the gems.

The last time we spoke about clothes, I showed you my fave splurge website, with all its gorgeous luxury. But my guilty pleasure? Yeah, it's Delia's. When I get endless compliments on my perfect cotton slouchy bag with the yellow bow? Do I just say thank you and smile coyly, knowing in my heart how much I spent on it? No! I shout out: Thanks! I got it for seventeen dollars and sixty-five cents!! Bwah hah hah hah!!!

But my best find so far (one that's no longer available, alas) is my beloved black eyelet ballet flats. Like Audrey Hepburn wishes she had. They are perfect with jeans, and I swoon a little each time I slip 'em on. And ooh, I just swooned again thinking of them.

So, am I telling you to slog through the junk all on your own without any help from La Real Girl? Please. Have you been reading this site long enough to be familiar with my obscene love of lists? If not, then today is your lucky day.

Here are Real Girl's faves of the fall season at Delias.com! (And yes, I know some of you with malls have actual Delia's stores. I am jealous of you right now. A Delia's store may be the one thing NYC doesn't have. That, and Dairy Queen. Which is particularly heartbreaking because they still show Dairy Queen ads for New Jersey and Connecticut, and so I am left drooling over a cheesecake sundae thingie that's on my TV but that I CAN'T HAVE....Moving on.)

Here's Listy McListypants!

The Sweater Boot: I don't quite know why I want this boot so much. They probably can't get wet, they must be impossible to clean...and yet I can so picture them all slouchy with a cute mini skirt or over jeans...
The Perfect Tank: Ignore the skull and crossbones and check out the solid version. Long enough to avoid the dreaded lift-up-my-hands-and-oops!-there's-my-tummy syndrome. So key, that.
The Grandma Bag: This just looks like a perfect flea market find to me. Comfy.
The Peasanty Skirt: Pair it with your own Non-AC/DC shirt and how cute would it be?
The Tweedy Cap: For the 60s British Mod Girl in us all.
The Charm Bracelet: Have you seen one more charming?
The Mini Vest: It's a vest! It's wee! Awwww.
The Peephole Top: So basic and wearable, yet a little sexy too.
The Girlie Coat: This? Might be the cutest coat ever. I want. Waaaaaaaaant. (Is it warm? Probably not!)
The Belted Pea: If you want a more sophisticated coat, this would be an adorable option.

So there you go. Real Girl's Delia's picks of the season. Things to consider: Shipping is free with orders over $75, but be sure to look for the code for that and type it in at checkout. Returns? Not free. That is annoying and the biggest drawback of catalog shopping, but in my mind still worth it given these prices. Also? Beware any pants that mention flare. For some reason, Delia's does not want the bottoms of these trousers to ever get near your ankles. Flare means bell bottoms.

But what about you? What are your favorite online shopping sites? Have you found any other Delia's options we need to know about? Do you want to crow about your favorite bargain places? Anything at all?

You know I love ya!
Real Girl
xx

Can Eye Have A Drum Roll Please

Holy Oh My God, Batman! Why did I chose to write tonight’s post directly after the season premiere of Lost!? Shake. Shiver. Shrug it off.

Moving on.

Real Girl Confession number gajagillion: I like pretty things. Like ribbons and eyelet and lace. Like color. Soft, rich, deep, charming, gorgeous, just exactly right color. Like my beloved, ever changing Body Shop Shimmer Cubes.

Why beloved? Come with me on the journey. You’re at the makeup counter, or you’re at the drugstore. You’re looking for the perfect eye shadow. That mixture of glamour and wearability that so few eye shadows hit exactly right. Ooh! There it is!! That one color your lids just have to have. Eureka! Except…hey. What’s this? What’s that other, much less cool color, some taupe or sickly beige or weird blue-green. You mean I’ve got to get those other pewy colors in order to get my favorite one? Man. That sucks.

But not with shimmer cubes. Love me some shimmer cubes. Love. Adore. Hug. First of all, every color is a winner. They’re divinely rich shades with just the right amount of shimmer. It’s that shimmer that makes you look dewy without the greasy shine. It’s that shimmer that sparks up your whole eye and says yes, I am gorgeous. You may trail after me, but clean up your own drool please.

Why ever-changing? Here’s the thing about the Body Shop. They’re big into seasonal items. The first four colors of shimmer cubes I bought two years ago no longer exist. But you know what? There are new colors now and I totally want them. And what’s more? Them cubey suckers are deep. There’s enough product there to potentially last a lifetime. My shimmer cubes from two years ago show no sign of running out any time soon.

(A total aside. Remember how obscenely bereft I was over the discontinuation of my favorite blushy bronzer—a cousin of the shimmer cube—the Shimmer Wave? Good news folks. Fabulous heaps of good news. My Precious is back! Backy back back! Swoony yay. Yaaaay.)

But we’re on the cubes here. Must focus on shimmery eye goodness. Wanna see more colors? Because they are all so fab that I want to just let my credit card out of its little cozy and let it do what it’s best at. Buying me pretty things!

You’ve already seen the new autumn colors above, a scrumptious mix that’ll make any eye smoke like hell. Make sure you dab that lightest color in the inner corner of your eyes and just under the brow bone for luscious highlights. Great, now who’s drooling?

Next comes a warmer palette, probably better used separately than together. That silver could look great swiped on the bottom lid—just a tad for an icy effect. And the warm rose will make any cold day feel sunny.

Finally, we reach out to the earth tones, in all their browny tawny goodness, to send our eyes on safari. To smoke them up more softly than black can. To give us earthly nirvana.

Looking at these colors just sends chills through me. And many thanks to Ahe for putting eye shadow on the brain.

What about you guys? Will you share your eye shadowy goodness with us all?

Or do you just want to find out who won the first splendiferous Real Girl Beauty Contest. Let’s recap. Real Girl said: Ooh! Write me a poem about your favorite product. You said: Ooh! We not only look pretty but we write real good too. Kudos to each and every one of you who entered. You are special. And man, it was hard to choose a winner! It came down to a final three, all of whom were delightfully fab and it’s so hard to publish only two! But those were the rules, and who wants to break the rules? There will be more contests in the future. It’s just too fun.

But first, our runner up! She’s getting married on Saturday! And I’ll be there! What really got me, besides the slamming rhymes, were the mentions of ingredients. Mmmm, ingredients…So here’s our bride-to-be…Liz!

We all know from Real Girl's rants
the awesome powers of antioxidants.
Whether we get them from blueberry shakes
or carrot juice and sweet potato cakes,
they help our systems, our skin, our hair,
and they're in my fav product, about which I'll share.

My Optimum Antioxidant Facial Mask!
It nourishes well and takes dryness to task.
It has SilyMarin, from artichoke hearts,
As well as liposome, to absorb in all parts.
I have to admit, that what I like when I preen,
is its silky texture and silvery sheen.

It's not too expensive, but I'm not good at splurging
(especially when my wallet's been purging)
I think when the wedding is, at last, fin
I might buy my mask as a treat for my skin.
But meanwhile, if you want something new
I think the artichoke hearts will work well for you.

Are you feeling like slathering artichoke hearts all over your face too? And you thought they were just good for salads…

And now…drum roll please!! Our sample package winner! And look—she spells things all British-like and so must be extra charming! Here’s the beauty from Léonie, one of our Londoners!

A contest. Fabulous. Great,
I thought
I'll give that one a whirl.
See if I can think of something
To impress the wise Real Girl.

So I sat and chewed my virtual pen
And had a little think
What had a special place both in my heart
And by my bathroom sink?

I supposed I could write a sonnet
About my lipgloss. Or a song
About shampoo.
I could effuse about my hand cream
In a short but sweet hailku.

But then, in an epiphany
That flashed before my eyes,
I knew the most important thing to me
Of course! To moisturise.

I think sometimes that without it
(Although at this you may well scoff)
My facial skin would crumble, peel
And crack
Then fall right off.

If there's one that works the very best
To maintain my glowing dimple,
It has no colour, perfume, it's pure as snow
And is called, quite aptly, 'Simple'.

It's small and unassuming
A cheap-ish moisturiser,
But I could tell you it's all fancy and costs the earth
And you'd all be none the wiser.

So this, in the end, is a simple rhyme
And it might not win the prizes.
But I wanted to show the importance to me
Of being a girl who moisturises.


Congratulations, Léonie! Email Real Girl your address and your samples will be on their way!

So! Poetry and eye shadow. And you thought you just came here to look at something pink.

What gorgeous shade of eye adornment have I missed, my sweets?

With love,
From one Real Girl to another.
xx

Coming Soon!!

Update, Tues 9/20: Oooh! We have a winner and a runner up!! Wow, that was a hard contest to judge...So Wednesday night we'll chat about eye shadow and give away the prize! Weee!

Stay tuned for Real Girl's favorite eye shadow!!

Needless to say, I'm busy reading a plethora of delightful, fun, and beautilicious poems (take that, Emily Dickinson with your reclusive pastiness).

Until the winner and runner up are published, here's Real Mom's entry to tide you over. Also?? Dear Real Mom's in desperate need of a new volumizing shampoo that doesn't dry out her baby fine tresses--so any and all suggestions are welcome, my friends.

Here's the first poem, with all its lippy goodness.

My lips used to be horribly flaky,
Extremely dry and very caky.
I tried the obvious, Chap Stick,
But it didn't do the trick.
Got a bonus sample from Clinique;
"All About Lips" my interest did pique.
I smoothed it on, so white and milky,
And soon my lips felt soft and silky.
Moisturizes AND exfoliates,
If I were single, it'd get me dates.


And I remain your,
Real Girl
xx

(And she remains my,
Real Mom xx)

Favorite Beauty Tips!

First of all, I beseach you, my dearies, don't be intimidated by the contest. It's fun! Just slap together a couple of lines, any length at all. You've got 'til Friday! You'll make Real Girl smile and you might get some yummy samples!

Ok. So. The most common email I get, besides--what's [insert product here] like?--is this: "Real Girl," y'all ask. "Besides the products you use, what tips can you tell us so that we're getting the most out of our beauty routine?"

Erm...well. Ok. So. Tips. See, I think all the little tips and secrets I have are all common knowledge. I've gotten them from magazines mostly, and though I swear by them all, I never thought they'd be that interesting. SO. Here's where it gets good. If I show you mine, will you show me yours? It's a tipathon! Tippity Tiptip Land! Let's all share our little must-do's of our beauty regimens. Me first!

1. This is my fave! It totally works! After applying lip balm or lipstick, dab a dot of clear or gold gloss (or if you're white-pale, clear or peach/beige) on the inner center of your bottom lip. It will totally add the illusion of volume and it will be sexy as hell.

2. After you apply your anti-aging and sunscreen products on your face, wipe the extra on your neck. Because who wants to be Waddle Duck Wrinkle Neck? Also, don't forget your lips, including the outer outline. Who wants those feathery lines that leech out your lipstick?

3. Another Real Girl Must: The inner eye corner brightening trick. For day, dab concealer on the inner corners of your eyes to instantly illuminate your whole face. For night, use white eye shadow or a light-refracting product.

4. This seems so common sense...but I always put clear nail polish over my mani or pedi the day after and then every other day after that to make it last.

5. You're all exfoliating before shaving your legs, right? (Thee who don't wax, that is.) It will get rid of all the dead skin cells to give you a much closer shave.

6. After applying lip balm from a tin, I love to rub the extra balm into my cuticles. Why wipe it off on a tissue? Tissues don't have lips or cuticles.

7. We went over this one recently: After applying self-tanner, both wash your hands and exfoliate too. Mmmm. Word of the day? Exfoliate. Love it.

8. Ooh! How to wear eye shadow without looking like you're wearing eye shadow. My fave look for day: Using your finger, smudge some brown or bronze eye shadow into your outer eye crease until it looks like a shadow (hee no pun intended). You've just opened up your whole eye! You know, as opposed to just half of it.

9. You don't need a special cleanser for your makeup brushes. In fact, the best product to use is your facial cleanser; that way you're making sure there are no irritating ingredients on your brushes.

10. This tip I got from my beloved hair stylist, Julie: Mixing a teaspoon of baking soda in your shampoo once in a while will completely rid your hair of product build-up! Not that I usually rave about product-free hair, but...Yay!

11. This one's for all you out of towners, the many Real Girl readers in different countries (love you!). Often I get wails of pain from folks without Sephoras or access to some products we take for granted here in the states. Especially in New York! Forget about Sally Struthers's children for a minute. There are people without entire skin care brands out there. And 40 cents a day, the price of a cup of coffee in 1984, ain't gonna get it to them. So. Here's something that will! Beauty.com, which is owned by drugstore.com, will ship to 30 countries worldwide! Yee!

Ok, girls (and guys? Didn't think so.)
What are your fabulous tips! I can't wait to hear!! And try!! Whee!!
xx
Lovies!
Real Girl

The Real In Real Girl

Saaaadly I do not have the time tonight for my Real Girl tip post (coming Wednesday night! Promise!) So instead, I will indulge another of your email requests (most recently asked by Bethany. Hi Bethany!) to post another pic.

In honor of this weekend, when Real Boy and I attend our final Mets game of the season, I submit here Exhibit A: How to be a Real Girl at a ball game.

Pink hat? Check.
Flirty yet age-appropriate pigtails? Check.
Flawless, makeup free complexion? HAHAHAHAHAHA.

As.
If.

I've got it all on, babes. The Clinique Quick Corrector concealer, the Brow Zings, the Body Shop Shimmer Waves, and the Aveda Lip Tint--all my Must Haves I've talked about at length in the past ten months.

I love looking fresh faced. As long as "fresh" means "really made up, even though you can't see it. Psych!"

More beauty talk soon. Enough of me, me, me, me. Bo-ring.
But I remain your,
Real Girl xx

P.S. Am I the only one who thinks my boobies look ferociously lopsided here? It's the shirt.

Contest! Conditioner! Can You Take It? Course!

First things first. Oh God, oh God, my heart and everything else goes out to New Orleans and all the victims of Katrina. And their friends and relatives too. Truly, it’s unthinkable how much so many people have gone through. But as I've said before, it's when there's nothing but despair and trauma all over TV and the news that I think entertainment is most necessesary to ease our minds for just a moment. Doesn't mean we're forgetting the thousands of people with flat nothing who need our help and prayers. Really, really doesn’t.

But now on to the show.

And by “show,” I mean the First Ever “Real Girl Beauty” Contest, in which you, the beauties, will be emailing me, the Real Girl (not that y’all aren’t real girls. But if you aren’t, that’s fine too) your ultra creative entries on this subject:

A poem—of any kind. Haiku? Sonnet? Limerick? Free verse? ABBA? ABAB? Etc?—all about your favorite beauty product. Bonus points, of course, for ingeniously including why you love said product.

(Note: This type of contest is what Real Mom lives for. She has, in fact, won honorable mention or some such thingie in some haiku contest about some product that I’ll probably be scolded for forgetting. So, one rule here. If you’re my friend in “real” life? Go ahead and enter. If we’re related? Maybe not so much. But Real Mom, if I love your entry, I’ll publish it anyway. Because I’m a fabulous daughter who makes you think of hearts and rainbows.)

I’ll publish the winner and an honorable mention here on the pinkness of RGB.

But the winner? Also gets a prize. A prize so special, I got it for free! (I’m a gal on a budget, folks.) Yeah, Winner, you’re getting samples. Stop gasping in surprise, okay? Oh and even more special? The samples are quite small! (Well, except for the mascara, which is cute but probably has some nice use in it…The lip gloss ain’t bad either…but now I’m just giving it all away.)

Here goes:
1. Clinique Colour Surge Impossibly Glossy lip gloss in Azalea (Lovely texture. Pink color.)
2. Clinique High Impact Mascara (Best if you're looking for length over thickness.)
3. Smashbox Photo Finish Foundation Primer (By the way? This product has some lovely antioxidants including safflower and grape seed extract, so it can be used as a serum even if you’re not big on foundation!)
4. Kiehl’s Creme With Silk Groom (Many consider this one of the best hair products ever. It’s most appropriate for someone with normal-to-thick hair, but if you’ve got fine hair you can try using just a wee bit.)

So there you go. Free samples that you could probably get yourself. But that will be sent to you by me if you write me a poem about your favorite beauty product. Send me the sucker at realgirlbeauty@yahoo.com by Friday, September 16. As you’ll see in the comments, if you’re out of the US, you may still apply, but you should know that if the shipping costs become ridiculous, I may have to use the cheap slow shipping. God, why am I even doing this contest? To herald the fact that I can only afford a free gift right now? And ghetto shipping?

Yay!!!

Which brings me so nicely to….Budget Conditioner!

Now, let me say right here and now that today’s conditioner is actually comparable or better than some more expensive, even Sephora-carried brands I’ve used. I’m pretty sure folks agree with me--because of all the internet searches that bring y'all to Real Girl Beauty? “Garnier Frucis” is the second most popular. (By the way? You wouldn’t believe me if I told you the #1 most popular search. I barely believe me. But for real? It’s people searching for images of Jenn C. from last season’s Apprentice. I have no explanation for you there. None. Nada.)

Ok. So you may remember (but probably don’t) my very first Real Girl Beauty entry, inspired by Garnier Fructis Fortifying Cream Conditioner for Fine Hair. (I didn’t even know how to link then. Isn’t that cute?) In the months since, I’ve been experimenting with more members of the Fortifying Cream Conditioner family, and I’m now able to tell you which Garnier conditioner is right for you! Whee!

Garnier Fructis Fortifying Cream Conditioner, Fine Hair (aka the Real Girl Original): What’s great about this conditioner, is that it doesn’t have a lot of the ingredients that weigh down fine hair. What’s not so great? Those ingredients are the detanglers. So, if you’ve got short, very fine hair, this would be your best option.

Fortifying Cream Conditioner, Dry or Damaged Hair: This one puts softness above all else. A comparable product would be Frederic Fekkai (which is $18!). This would be a better option for folks with thicker hair who need some of the baby softness that we fine-haired gals try to fight like a mother.

Fortifying Cream Conditioner, Sleek & Shine: This is Real Girl’s current fave! Somehow it manages to detangle and handle my flyaways without making my hair so soft that it loses all body. Mmmmm. Boddddy.

Fortifying Deep Conditioner, 3 Minute Masque: This product has a lot of the same qualities as the Sleek & Shine above. I use it once in a while so as to avoid the dreaded Product-Stopped-Working Syndrome that’s bound to happen if you use your favorite conditioner every single day. Spiteful syndrome, that.

Join the fun! Got questions? Have you tried a Garnier product you must praise or pan? Have another cheapie conditioner you love? Know of a pricier conditioner we’ve just got to invest in? (Ooh! I’m dying for a Kerastase recommendation…) Tell us! Tell us quickly!!

And! Send me your poems by Sept. 16!

Because clearly, babe, you realize
Life is better when you moisturize.
And your skin retains its youthful sheen
When you’re liberal with that damn sunscreen.
Just remember dearies, there’s no “Can’t”
In the blessed word, “Antioxidant.”

You can do much better.
And I remain your,
Real Girl
xx

I? Am Glowy. NATURALLY GLOWY!!

If you’ve seen the commercials for Jergens Natural Glow Daily Moisturizer, you’ve seen a smiling model appearing decidedly unnatural. She looks more like Princess Or Ange of Planet Faketania. This? Is a shame. Though I’m not sure Jergens is hurting much, because I looked for this product for ages, and all the local drug stores were sold out. Why? Quite frankly, because this is one of the most exciting, results-providing products I’ve come across in a very long time. Real Girl is in lurve.

Generally, I sample a product for at least two weeks before I rant or rave about it to you lovely people. But after only a week of Jergening my heart out, I can’t hold it in any longer. Witness, in fact, this real life conversation with Real Boy, which took place after just three applications:

Real Boy to Real Girl: “Hey, you’re tan.”
Real Girl to Real Boy (to paraphrase): “Whatchu talkin’ ‘bout, Willis?”

No one knows better than Real Boy how little I’ve been outdoors this summer. New York’s just been so awfully humid, and I haven’t even had one beach day. And yet the other day at the gym? For the first time in months, I was not the palest girl in step class. My friends, I look tan. Not Long-Island, Stay-in-the-Sun-All-Day tan, but with—and here I praise heartily a product that lives up to its promise—a definite natural glow. There’s no orange tint in sight and definitely no frightening self-tanner streaks. My precious little tan grew over about 3-5 applications, and I love it! I just stare at my arms all day! My legs no longer reflect light off passing puddles! I am glowy and fabulous! I am natural looking! I am tan woman, hear me squeeeee!

OK. Now to the parsing of the product. Pay attention! This is crucial! I’ve learned through experience!

1) Exfoliate your knees and elbows before using. I definitely noticed a build up of color around my rough elbow skin. Both exfoliating and lightly pre-moisturizing that area helped.
2) If you’ve achieved the color you want, don’t worry about skipping a day. I’m applying about every other day now, and I still love my color.
3) Don’t forget tops of feet (but avoid rough heels!) and backs of hands.
4) IMPORTANT: Don’t just wash your palms after use. Also exfoliate them with a rough product, like my ever-lovin’ St. Ives apricot scrub. One of my biggest self-tanner fears was walking around with red hands. I’m happy to say my palms look completely normal.
5) Try to wait at least fifteen minutes before putting on clothes or sitting on a sofa.

If I think of any more do’s and don’ts, I’ll add to the list. But for now, just know that this is a must-have product for the pale. (As for the not-so-pale? If you’ve used this product, I’d love to know your results. Does it work for you too?) Let’s spend a minute, here, on which option you should choose: Fair or Medium.

I chose Medium, and I’m endlessly happy I did. If you’re not the palest of the pale, I’d recommend this option. I’m usually the second palest in foundation, and I have yellow undertones. The only people who I’d recommend use the fair skin option are those with very pale skin and blue undertones. Think Claire from the recently departed Six Feet Under. Not that she’s told me she’s looking for a new self-tanner, but—you know—if she did, I’d say choose Jergen’s for Fair Skin.

I love it! I recommend it highly! I can overlook the annoying extra lotiony smell! I don’t tan easily, folks. Jergen’s Natural Glow? I’m sleeping with you under my pillow. You’re my precious. My preccccciousssssss.

Have you tried this product too? And if you did, at what degree of paleness did you start and what results did you see? Do you have another self-tanner to recommend? Anything at all, my dearies? Can’t wait to hear you!

With love,
From one Real Girl to another.
xxx

Eye, Eye Captain!

My lovelies, do it with me. The Free Stuff dance. Performed to the Free Stuff Song. “Free Stuff! Baby Free Stuff! Gimme your stuff, gimme gimme your stuff, gimme gimme. Free Stuff! Baby Free Stuff! Gimme your stuff, gimme gimme your stuff, gimme gimme all your stufffff, all your stuff-uff-uff.”

Bloomingdales! Around the country! Starting August 31! Free gift at Clinique! But what’s in the free gift, Real Girl, you may ask. Well, guess what? My posse at the Bloomie’s Clinique counter gave me a wee little peek. And, okay, not all of it is thrilling. There’s the requisite, though nice sized, sample of toner. The four neutral tones of eye shadow. The bubble gum pink lip gloss (shiny!), and the baggie of cotton balls and Q-tips. But what’s really exciting? So exciting that Real Girl may have to follow up this entry with one on Clinique Eye Product #2? A divine little sample of Clinique’s latest eye treatment, Repairwear Intensive Eye Cream. This beaut purports to fight fine lines with a nice peptide base. But does it work? If you get the free gift, be sure to share!!

But now on to Clinique Eye Product #1, All About Eyes: And here—as has become habit lately—Real Girl confesses. I’m stymied. I’ve perused the ingredients of this lovely little eye cream, and I’m not sure what makes it so splendiferous. Antioxidants? It’s got a bit of green tea and grape extract, but nothing that’s got me jumping off the walls. De-puffing? It’s got caffeine, the eternal ingredient of the depuff, which aids in reducing swelling. Dark circles? Ahem. Here Clinique cheats a little, using ingredients that inhibit melanin production—great if your darkness is due to melanin, not so much if (as with mine) it’s due to bone structure, shadows, etc. So…what is it, Clinique? WHAT AM I MISSING? It’s driving me crazy. There’s no reason I can see that this product should be as damn awesome as it is.

Should we chalk it up to miracle?

Let’s break it down. First of all: texture. This eye cream, in my book, has achieved the Holy Grail of eye cream texture. It’s light and cool, a silicone based moisturizer, which means it’s slippery and thin. You know how I’m always nagging you not to rub your eyes (and cause hateful, damning wrinkles)? Well, with this texture, it’s impossible to rub the eye area because your finger slides gently over your delicate skin as you tap, tap, tap away. I went through two samples of this baby, and with every use I continued to marvel at the lovely feel of this gentle, love-to-slather-it-on, gel/lotion hybrid.

But you know what? Here’s where I’m stumped. Those tiny fine lines around my eyes? The ones I’m always complaining about, even though I’m the only one who sees them? I don’t know how, but somehow when I use this eye cream, they seem less…less liney. My skin looks glowier, softer, plumper (in a good way). It’s like my eye skin has written me a love letter saying Real Girl? We likey. We really, really likey. I mean, don’t expect your lines to disappear…but if you’re early in the line-forming stage, as I am in my (very) late twenties, then this sweet gem may just make you smile. (And since you’re already using your antioxidant serum under All About Eyes and your sunscreen over it, you can smile all you want because you’re protecting against those laugh lines. I, for one? Refuse to stop laughing. Especially at myself.)

Basically? My sample ran out two weeks ago. I am DYING. I’m seeing those thready lines again, I swear. I wish I could tell you what Clinique's secret ingredient is here…but I’m thinking it might just be magic.


Abra Cadabra Presto Clinique-o!

xx
Real Girl

(But what about you? Have you tried All About Eyes? Or the new Repairwear for Eyes? Want to gush over your favorite eye products? Depuffers? Anything at all? Chat away, my dears!)